Etiquette at an Onsen

Etiquette demands in Japan can sometimes seem a bit overwhelming, primarily because of the cultural differences that even now continue to exist between our very individualistic society and the much more group-centered social setting in Japan.

During our tour, we will encounter many instances where we'll need to modify our behavior so as not to embarrass ourselves or our hosts, but probably none as daunting as the expectations involved in staying overnight "in the Japanese style."

On our itinerary we will spend one night in the Fuji-Five Lakes area high in the Japan Alps along the stone cliffs abutting a mountain stream at TENSEIEN, a Japanese onsen ("hot springs resort") where we will also have both dinner and breakfast the next morning.

Here are some guidelines about what to expect; many of these expectations we'll encounter elsewhere along the way, so that by the time we arrive in Hakone, many of these "modifications in behavior " will seem almost second nature! No need to worry all that much, then, about committing an unforgivable faux pas.

The Japanese distinguish between "interior" (uchi) and "exterior" (soto) space by removing their shoes when entering a private or privileged space. They wear slippers on hard wooden surfaces while inside, then remove even these to walk barefoot or in stocking feet on the tatami woven straw floor coverings found in traditional style Japanese rooms. So when we arrive at TENSEIEN, we'll likely spend much of our time in slippers or socks, leaving our shoes at the entrance (often in stacked storage racks).

Another way to distinguish "interior" from "exterior" worlds is to bathe soon after arriving and then put on a yukata blue-and-white cotton sleeping robe for the duration of your stay. Once one arrives in one's room, one also likely sits down briefly for a cup of tea (cold barley tea in summer, hot green tea in winter) and a sweet even before changing into a yukata or unpacking. Again, this ritualized expectation is meant to distinguish the serene onsen spa-like experience from that found in the hectic world of everyday life "outside".

At a typical Japanese inn, one would dine in one's room. Dinner would be taken in the presence of a kimono-clad maid who would preside over the repast, serving tea, beer or sake and chatting with you over the meal. When groups of travelers take in an onsen experience, however, the group usually eats together in a banquet room set aside for its use instead.

The meal (often referred to as kaiseki) consists of numerous small dishes of seasonal and local specialties which are eaten in any order desired (or simply left untouched if thought unappealing). Usually, too, some kind of (silly and often embarrassingly childish) entertainment is incorporated into the meal in an attempt to lighten the mood and further relax the crowd.

Visitors to a Japanese hot springs resort are usually drawn by the access provided to the hot springs themselves. TENSEIEN, for example, boasts four hot springs baths (two for men and two for women, one each inside and outside in the open air) for the enjoyment of guests. These are not treated by the Japanese, however, as we would treat swimming pools or hot tubs in the United States or Europe; that is, bathers "take the waters" in the all together, not wearing bathing suits or otherwise clad for modesty's sake. Another part of the ritual involves washing outside the pool before entering so as not to contaminate the water ...

Japanese have never traditionally associated nudity with sex per se. Therefore the naked body is not seen primarily as erotic in and of itself as is often the case in the West. Even in Japan, however, over the past century and a half Western notions in this respect have seeped into the local culture; and, as a consequence, mixed bathing is VERY unusual in contemporary Japan.

Proper behavior, still then, though, requires bathers, male and female alike, to take off their clothes in the bath, using a small combination washcloth and towel, properly placed, to maintain some degree of appropriate modesty.

Another strategy often utilized today even by Japanese patrons is to go into the bath when no one else is around. Since the baths are open long hours at a time (the men's baths at TENSEIEN, for example, are open 24/7), one can usually slip in alone or in the company of only one's closest friends to enjoy the experience. Since the baths all have an attached changing room, it's easy enough to ascertain if one is apt to be alone -- and often others will not enter if they sense the bath is already occupied. Again, this doesn't always work out, but it may be worth a try for the more modest among us.

Our rooms at TENSEIEN will be in the Japanese style -- floors covered with tatami mats set during the day with a low table and flat zabuton pillows (often nowadays with a backrest provided as well). There may be some low chairs on the veranda, but otherwise one lounges about seated on the floor around the low table during the day.

After dinner in the evening, the table and pillows are put away and a futon fold-up mattress replaces them, turning the room into sleeping quarters. Japanese pillows are rice-hull filled and much harder than those we're used to, and often a night light and a tray with glasses and water are placed near the head of the bed for nighttime use; turning off the overhead light usually requires several pulls on the attached string to cycle through the various possibilities.

Remember, too, to use your bathroom slippers in the toilet room, leaving them behind on exiting the facilities ...

Breakfast may give us the opportunity to try on a traditional Japanese morning repast, consisting of rice, seaweed, smoked fish, raw egg, miso soup, tea and pungent pickles, a robust and hearty meal that you might never have had the opportunity to try before. But, here again, the Japanese have shifted towards a more Western style breakfast over the years themselves, so toast and jam, eggs and coffee are just as likely to turn up.

The key to the entire experience here is to be prepared and forewarned about what to expect, then to go with the flow, always aware that you have not been sentenced to ever having to experience this entire undertaking ever again. So enter in with gusto and enthusiasm, taking our night at a Japanese onsen for the cultural experience it is meant to be.

Enjoy yourself and you're sure to gain the expected relaxation benefits so culturally prized by your Japanese hosts!